Boozy McGuzzles

BOOZE TYPE: Wine
PRICE: $6.99 at Astor Center
RATING: C+

It’s Friday night! I want a bottle of wine! I know I shouldn’t listen to the voice in my head that’s all HEY LET’S BUY A $35 BOTTLE OF SAKE HUH HUH ISN’T THAT A GOOD IDEA? even though it’s got this other friend, a little whispery voice that says, and on top of that it’s payday you know or you could use your credit card. So after a lap around Astor Center and a jaunt once or twice through the aisle, I decide, man, screw it! Let’s get some stuff from GREECE.

I had actually been planning on hunting up a decent Greek red wine sometime in the near future, to be partially mixed into a olive-based pasta sauce, and partially poured down my gullet. But I was feeling a little tired of red wine mouth stain, and also my groceries from FreshDirect won’t be here until tomorrow, so white wine it is!

I went for the Kourtaki because it was white, $7, and had a picture of a bull on the label. I played God of War II recently, and, I don’t know, it spoke to me in some mythological way. (Note to self: wine pairings for video games? could work.) The stuff is drinkable, but really not very thrilling. There are couple of nice fruity notes in the scent of it, but nothing that stands out heavily; it does have a nice mineral quality, which is something I always find very interesting. In the end, though, it just sort of leaves the “hello! I’m a generic white wine!” taste. Hmmm, I seem to be having this problem with wines that cost less than $10… could this mean something?!

BUY IT AGAIN: Nope. Let’s try something nicer from Greece, and not be fooled by bulls again.

BOOZE TYPE: Beer
PRICE: $9.75 at St. Marks Market
RATING: B+

Damn it, I really wanted more of the Smuttynose Hanami Ale tonight! It is that nice cool part of early spring before it gets too damn warm, perfect for something so tart and sharp! But alas, I apparently bought the last six-pack in existence last time, and am doomed to crave it forever and never enjoy it again. STUPID SEASONAL BREWS.

So, instead, it was time for old reliable Blue Moon. I go through phases of loving white/wheat beers and being massively “eh” on them. I think it probably changes with the weather. They are crisp and refreshing and none too heavy, and tend to be good with a spicy or rich meal. I just like saying the word “hefeweizen“, even. Blue Moon hits the sweet spot pretty well, staying light and bright on the tongue without totally lacking any body or character at all, like I feel the problem with Hoegaarden is.

Wheat beers are typically consumed with a lemon in them. Blue Moon has a twist on it, and is supposed to be served with an orange. Once upon a time, I tried to shove a wedge of blood orange down the neck of my bottle of Blue Moon. The resulting mess was somewhat ridiculous, but the beer that remained in the bottle when the foam died down was quite tasty. So, note to drinkers out there: if you’re going to cram some goddamned orange in your beer, pour it into a glass first.

BUY IT AGAIN: Of course. It’s not a beer that knocks my socks off, but it’s a reliable, easy drink.

BOOZE TYPE: Sake
PRICE: $19.99 at Astor Center
RATING: A+

I don’t know much about sake. I mean, I have had countless glasses of it, and heard the terms bandied around, but none of it seems to sink in much more than skin deep. When the sake urge comes, I buy more on terms of how pretty the bottle is, the price, and whatever inspiring words are on the placard put there by the liquor store. Astor Center fortunately has a fantastic sake section, all nice and defined and kept chilled. So, tonight, when I decided on my way home that I would make an evening of watching kabuki on YouTube, I knew it was sake time.

I picked the Mizu no Shirabe because it was $20, in a lovely light lavender bottle, and the placard described it as a delicate sake from Kyoto… so delicate as to be effeminate. Clearly the right pairing for my entertainment choice!

I like mixing it up and drinking sake now and then because it calls me to go for a whole different vocabulary, instead of just the standard wine words. This had a rich, silky feel over my tongue that ended after I swallowed with a little last burst or flame of alcoholic vapor curling up in my sinuses. Sake is no more alcoholic than wine, but wine rarely leaves my lips tingling so pleasantly.

Mizu no Shirabe is not too dry, and a nice level of creaminess that ends with just a little twist. If I lift my tongue tip when drinking (a trick taught to me by my older brother), it opens up a lot of soft, sweet flavors. Effeminate? Yes, I think so, but a little unexpected too… women can be dangerous, after all. Having Tamasaburo on the mind just makes me smile and connect that little twist on my tongue and tingling lips to his dance. Mmm, onnagata sake.

I think I’ll have to remember to drink more sake, because it keeps me from becoming complacent in how I taste things and think about things. It’s different in so many ways while maintaining a familiar base that it really wakes me up to the point of all this (beyond getting boozed, of course.)

BUY IT AGAIN: Yes, it’s lovely and was reasonably priced. But now I’m feeling inspired to explore sake in more depth…

BOOZE TYPE: Wine
PRICE: $7.99 at Astor Center
RATING: B-

I’ve been trying to do Spanish wines lately, because I think I like them… at least, I know I like a bunch of Portuguese stuff, and they’re like totally right next to each other? So I fussed over the Spanish selections in my wine shop and picked out this one, which met at the vertex of ‘price’ and ‘interesting blurb on the name card.’

When I poured this one out and stuck my nose in the glass, I thought, ‘Ah! This has the aroma of… wine! Yes, this definitely smells like wine! Red wine, even! Oh, by jove! It tastes like red wine, too!” …This is just sort of run-of-the-mill, one of the ones folk’ll call “drinkable” and not mean it as an insult. I tossed a glass into the pasta sauce I was making to great effect. This is kind of the perfect wine to cook with: good enough to drink on its own, but not so full of character as to overpower your dish.

This one definitely improved as it sat around in my bedroom and opened up more. When I didn’t have tomato sauce confusing my palate (though it went very well in and with the tomato sauce), I got some nice mineraly, chalky hints in the scent, and a spicy, kind of coffee flavor. The back of the label says it has hints of “licorice mint” and honestly that is just nonsense. Seriously, wine people, that is just nonsense. And if it weren’t nonsense, it would probably taste nasty. Dang!

BUY IT AGAIN: Probably not. It’s decent, but it didn’t wow me, and I’d rather explore more. It’s basically exactly what you’d expect from an $8 wine.

Smuttynose Hanami Ale

I’m a big fan of Smuttynose beer, and the appearance of their Pumpkin Ale on shelves is always a delightful sign that summer is going to end soon. So when I saw the six-pack with the cute little Japanese girl and manekineko on it, I was basically doomed. I’m such a sucker for seasonal beers.

The label promises that the beer is made with an ample dose of cherry juice, which had me a little nervous, because cherry is often one of my least favorite flavors, when it appears in that cloying, maraschino-cough syrup kind of flavor. I’ve tried one other cherry-type beer before, Sam Adams Cherry Wheat, and didn’t like it much at all. I wanted to try something new, though, and Smuttynose has never done me wrong before, so I bought it.

Delightfully enough, there’s none of the cough drop flavor in Hanami Ale. First gulp gives a very bright, sour-sweet, real cherry taste. It’s remarkably sweet and fruity at first, but not so much that you’d confuse it with one of the soda boozes that are so popular with the kids these days. The first cold sip is the sweetest, but as it warms up in your hand and airs out, the cherry mellows out and it tastes like a very sharp beer. Definitely good for drinking just by itself, and chased some spicy noodles quite well.

BUY IT AGAIN: Yes, probably, since it’s only available for a few months! I’m such a sucker for seasonable brews.

BOOZE TYPE: Wine
PRICE: $14.99 at Astor Center
RATING: A+

I first had Cline wine when I went on my whirlwind (okay, less whirlwind and more drunken tumbleweed) tour of Sonoma with my dearest friends Martha and Stephen. It was the last stop on our visit, and most of the reason was specifically to buy this wine, which is Stephen’s father’s favorite wine in the whole wide world, or so I’m told.

I’m pretty sure I had some of this that day, but it was the end of a day of many sips and pours, so I can hardly remember. The ‘ancient vines’ in the name means that the wine is made from what you would call in the food whore circles, heirloom grapes. I’ve had another of the Cline ancient vines wines, in that case a carignane (mmm, I loves me some carignane), and I tell ya, those old grapes make for some tasty stuff.

This zinfandel (and let me tell you, before my last trip to California, I did not know zinfandel outside of that godawful pink stuff my stepmother drinks) is delightful; I can see why Stephen’s dad, who is a gentleman of refined taste, would love it. The aroma is very rich… my first thought was leather when I was swirling it around, and then cinnamon, and eventually some berry and chocolate. The taste doesn’t have much of the tannic problem that often turns me off of red wine—instead it’s just rich on the tongue and all the way down.

If this wine were a man, it would be one of them dudes in pornographic Japanese manga. Like, a good one, with the broad shoulders and strong jawline and well-cut suits, not the kind that rapes you and makes you like it. I have definitely had wines that have raped me and made me like it, though. Those are mostly whites, though, I think.

BUY IT AGAIN: Yes, though the price makes me want to save it for special occasions.

Hello! My name is Whitney! I am a young lady who lives in New York City, and I enjoy beverages!

The purpose of this blog is for me to record my thoughts on the things I drink. This is mostly because, due to years of alcohol abuse and other unrelated brain damage, every time I go the liquor store, I’m left going… uh… what was that one thing I liked again?

I love wine, beer, and many other sorts of booze, and that is why I like to treat them as fun, and not with the seriousness one usually affords a poetry reading.

Cheers!